Interdependence and perspective

I'm mid-way through the Wellesley onslaught so am up early on a Sunday morning by force of habit (these are the only two weeks of the year that I awake before 6:30AM as a matter of course) so I was able to catch this week's On Being interview with Matthieu Ricard, "a French-born, Tibetan Buddhist monk [who] began his professional life at the cellular genetics laboratory of a Nobel Prize-winning biologist at the Pasteur Institute in Paris."

I've selected those passages that talk about interdependence & perspective. For their discussion about happiness, ego, and other things, please feel free to visit the website for the transcript & a recording of the talk.

Mr. Ricard: . . . I met Trinh Xuan Thuan in Andorra, in the Pyrenees. . . . And immediately, he said, “I’m born in Vietnam, born a Buddhist. I always wanted to have a dialogue about Buddhism and astrophysics, or modern science.” , , , The most fascinating thing I learned through this dialogue was precisely about something very deep about the nature of reality, related to interdependence and impermanence. [I]n modern physics . . . there’s non-localization, the fact that if one photon or particle split into two, and they shoot out at basically any distance in the universe, they still remain part of a whole. So there is something there that is still not separate. So that was an incredible insight for me, because interdependence is not just the fact that things are related but also that, therefore, they are devoid of a totally autonomous, independent existence.

. . . You would think that that rainbow is something existing on its own. Now behind you, you mask the rays of sun, and there is not a speck of existence of that rainbow that remains. It’s all gone, because you remove something, an element of a set of relations that crystallize that rainbow somehow as a phenomenon. . .

Mr. Ricard: , , , We are interdependent, even, I would say, even more deeply than what we mostly think. But that leads to, also, the sense of — interdependency is at the root of altruism and compassion. . .

Mr. Ricard: , , , So we have to distinguish mental factors which contribute to that way of being, the cluster of qualities like altruistic love, inner freedom, and so forth from those who undermine that, which is like jealousy, obsessive desire, hatred, arrogance. We call that “mental toxins,” because they poison our happiness and also make us relate to others in a poisonous way. , ,

But yet, we should acknowledge at the same time that you can be miserable in a little paradise, have everything, so-called, to be happy, and be totally depressed and a wreck within. And you can maintain this kind of joy of being alive and sense of compassion even in the worst possible scenario, because the way you translate that into happiness or misery, that’s the mind who does that. And the mind is that which experiences everything, from morning till evening. That’s your mind that translates the outer circumstances either into a sense of happiness, strength of mind, inner freedom or enslavement. So your mind can be your best friend, also your worst enemy, and it’s the spoiled brat of the mind needs to be taken care of, which we don’t do. We vastly underestimate the power of transformation of mind and its importance in determining the quality of every instant of our life. . .

That’s just very simple, but we don’t do that. We do exercise every morning, 20 minutes, to be fit. We don’t sit for 20 minutes to cultivate compassion. If we were to do so, our mind will change, our brain will change. What we are will change. So those are skills. They need to be, first, identified, then, cultivated. What is good to learn chess? Well, you have to practice and all that. In the same way, we all have thoughts of altruistic love. Who doesn’t have that? But they come and go. We don’t cultivate them. Do you learn to piano by playing 20 seconds every two weeks? This doesn’t work. So why, by what kind of mystery, some of the most important qualities of human beings will be optimal just because you wish so? Doesn’t make any sense . . .

Sometimes, you find a very difficult situation , , , I gave this example, which struck me. I was sitting outside our monastery once, and it was monsoon time in Nepal, a lot of mud and water. And we had put some bricks over about 20 to 30 meters, to go from one brick to the other to cross that mess. And one person came, a foreigner, and that person was just screaming, “How disgusting, this place!” And I was sitting there, and she’s going to scold me for it. [laughs] And then, so OK, then five minutes later, another person came, two ladies. And she was just hopping from one to the other, saying, “Oh, it’s so nice. It’s such fun. And when there is rain, there’s no dust.” And she was in exactly the same situation, and she had a sense of lightness and humor. The other one was just grumbling like crazy about it. So — same situation, different perspective.

Who is the "we"?

Segments of an interview with Rabbi Lau-Lavie by Krista Tippett: 

I want to share . . . this Talmudic parable about a ship that is sailing, and there are many cabins. And one of the people in the cabins on the lower floor decides to dig a hole in the floor of his cabin, and does so, and sure enough, the ship begins to sink. And the other passengers suddenly discover what’s going on and see this guy with a hole in the floor. And they say, “What are you doing?” And he says, “Well, it’s my cabin. I paid for it.” And down goes the ship.
. . .
And it’s a story in the Talmud that talks about human responsibility in the Jewish sense — that we’re all in the same ship together. But I’ve been wrestling with it and talking about . . .  what does it mean for us to be that person? And where have we been only focusing on my cabin and me-me-me-me-me-me-me-me-me-me, and where are we not part of a “we”? And how is that true of every single one of us, and how that is true in some ways of America, and how the narcissistic, me-focused, insight-driven, my own needs and aspirations in this age have taken so hold of us that the sense of public and communal and responsible-for-other, including the limping and the weak at the edges of our camp, in some way has not been looked at as religious traditions have taught us to and as the Bible again and again reminds us: “Remember the Other. Remember the Other. You were the Other.”
And then the question is, what is the “we,” because the boundaries of what is “we “are shifting.
. . .

It’s so easy to descend into animosity and either/or. . . . And I’m trying to think, how do we use love? How do we go face-to-face in difficult conversations with those who see the world so differently than some of us and whose values are coming from the good place of “me” and “preservation,” and even have a “we” in mind, but it’s not as expansive and radical as the we that I’m thinking of and some of us are? How do we use love? . . .

Ms. Tippett: Yeah, and it is something we — we have to walk this, right, because there aren’t answers to that question you’re posing. I mean I was thinking, also, at the very beginning when you talked about a new sense of God being born after the Holocaust, that the kindness — kindness — I mean I think love is also — it sounds so grand, and it sounds like it’s something you have to feel. And this love we have to practice now and learn to practice is so much more practical than that.

Rabbi Lau-Lavie: It’s daily. It’s daily practice. It’s ironic to me now — I’m in my late 40s, and I’m a father, and I’m a rabbi, and I’m looking at my life and how it’s evolving and who knows what else. And I sit every morning for a few moments, wrapped up in my father’s prayer shawl. I meditate and write in my journal. I rarely use any of the liturgical texts. And what it’s about is discipline. It’s just daily discipline. It’s a workout. And it’s the workout for gratitude. And it’s a workout for what Heschel called radical amazement and wonder. And it’s just an exercise in meditation in silence. Sit for a few moments and cultivate love.

Words to live by

From a fellow Raveler (the links are mine):

"Be tender to each other. Be more tender than you were yesterday, that’s what I would like. You want to help me? Be tender and laugh." Brian Doyle (maybe this link will last longer).

"If I could tell you only one thing. My message would be this: The world would be a lonely place if you did not exist."
― Erin Hanson

Oh let the sun beat down upon my face, stars to fill my dream
I am a traveler of both time and space, to be where I have been.
..Kashmir ~ Led Zeppelin

A smile is a curve that sets everything straight. Phyllis Diller

Aging is a privilege, not a birthright.

Life is about not knowing, having to change, taking the moment and making the best of it, without knowing what’s going to happen next. Delicious ambiguity.”– Gilda Radner

I am in training to become a difficult old woman. It’s going swimmingly, y’all!

I was born with nothing, and I still have some left!

Courtesy is not a shirt one puts on in the morning. a saying from my Mam…

“Incivility is not incivility’s antidote”. Lillian Boxfish Takes a Walk. by Kathleen Rooney. (page 11)

About that stash

Since my stash somehow keeps growing faster than my ability to knit it down, I thought I'd share with you a blog post by a fellow Raveler who discusses the same issue. (Sorry, can't seem to find a link to the first part.)

She has these images on the post that I thought were just to good not to share.

For the uninitiated, That's Dumbledore with the pattern book.
And for the record, that's an actual, factual clip from the movie
"Harry Potter and the Half-blood Prince.

Also for the record, Lalie (a.k.a. StrawberryDarling on Ravelry) has 358 yarns in her stash, I have 183 more. You do the math.

Happy 4th

From another perspective:

:) Hope you have a wonderful one.